Let’s be honest… society still frames submission as inherently feminine, and worse, as something less than.
From the mainstream, to household, and societal pressure, women have long been expected to “yield,” “nurture,” and “support,” while men are often told to reject such traits.
So when men and women begin to explore what it means to serve, receive/give direction, or let go of traditional roles, it pushes against decades of cultural conditioning. That discomfort isn’t personal, it’s structural, and makes it very difficult for compatible partners to find each other. Most people haven’t been taught to see a relationship with submission from men as a positive, along with its counterpart, dominance in women.
However, it is substantial, and will be respected as such. Especially in Chyrpe’s community, and it becomes one of the most powerful compliments a man can be in a partnership that reflects both individuals’ personalities. If you find yourself drawn to submission in dating, don’t run from it. Get curious. Ask yourself where that desire comes from, and what it might teach you about trust, communication, and power.
Patriarchal influence rarely gets discussed in mainstream dynamics, so it is important to have conversations around its limitations for dating.
Often dating, men are socialized to suppress. Many men feel they must constantly perform confidence, control, and decisiveness even when they’re craving connection, care, or something more balanced to their actual personalities. By contrast, FLR invites a shift. It offers space for men to explore other ways of intimacy, and presence without leading. However, shedding that internalized script isn’t easy. It takes reflection, unlearning, and ironically, a lot of strength.
There’s nothing submissive about simply trying to invert the current mainstream structure. What’s radical and changing, is learning yourself, listening to your partner, and following her lead while honoring her as the center of your shared experience.
Obviously, outside of kink, people don’t want to feel less-than, as in FLR and BDSM, submission is not solely about hierarchy—it’s more about design. You and your partner shape a dynamic that meets both your needs, honors your identities, and allows each of you to thrive in your roles.
If you’re a man exploring submission, just know that it doesn’t inherently erase your masculinity. It doesn’t make you weak. Nor does it make you any less worthy of love, agency, or respect. It simply means that you’ve chosen to serve—and that choice, when made with care, is one of the most intimate forms of love there is.
